've been getting the doldrums lately. Thinking on my past actions, what I've done, and what I've not done. In fact, I've been thinking so much that all the pressure and thoughts might just bring me a tad closer to my demise.

I've been thinking of ways to liaison, but words just don't seem to get through. I've been asking rhetorical questions and I try not to listen to the answers for I fear the answers, just might be the truth. Rigescence, is what I have been trying to achieve these past few days but I just can't seem to get there . Time and time again, I've been retrorsed whenever I want to solve a problem. I do not know if it is because all these are morological to you, but everytime it is ignored, I have to bear everything and it is onerous.

The starting moments were great, where everything that gave problems meant nothing in the world. For we had comfort in knowing that we had each other to rely on. But then, quiescent memories sprung up and that was when everything changed. The memories where one became two, and in which the heart, became untrusting. It wants to trust, but it can no longer suffer another breaking, thus it keeps itself locked, and the key thrown away. It's not fair that due to past experiences, one does not give trust or effort wholeheartedly.

Thus all I can do now is look to the special future that I would want, and praying that I, won't need to throw away my key too.



Cheh's birthday is today! Happy birthday !!! You and I get on each others' nerves all the time, but hey, I still love you for the sick ass you are!! I bet you're thinking that I might have a small surprise for you? And you're gonna try your best to foil my plans huh! "Well you were thinking it! But well you said it..!", I bet that's what you would say to me if you somehow managed to spoil it all. Ha-ha!! Sleep well and let this surprise go smoothly! ;)